Wednesday, 23 January 2013

Most Unnecessary Remake: Total Recall

How low are Hollywood executives willing to sink in pursuit of your thirteen dollars? Well, if your definition of low involves shamelessly rebooting another sci-fi classic on the off chance its name recognition will result in even a measly profit at the box office, then lower than that.

I'm talking of course about Len Wiseman's unimaginative remake of Total Recall. A film that makes you feel, much like the 1990 original, like you're being cruelly exploited by studio system as you step into the theatre and settle in for another lifeless reboot, filled with the standard fare of ridiculous plot holes; seizure-inducing cinematography; and everything-but-the-kitchen-sink CGI. (I dare you to try the drinking game where you take a two-finger swig every time another blinding lens flare pops up on the screen. You won't make it past the first shirtless Colin Farrell.) Far from adding anything to the story, it's a soulless, 120-minute-long video game masquerading as an action thriller. Stay tuned for the remake.

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